"I'm a big advocate for gay rights. I'd vote for gay marriage if it ever came up on the ballot."
Brad took a long drink of his beer. "Don't hold your breath on that one."
"The point is"--Gavin turned around from his spot on the floor where he sat with his back against the couch. The television cast flickers of color over his handsome face as he stared up at Brad.--"I'm secure in my sexuality. I don't care that you're gay."
"Thanks, Gav," Brad said, the bite in his voice harsh even to his ears. "Right backatcha. Most gay guys avoid drunk, straight assholes who think they deserve some sorta stud medal for letting us be in their presence, but don't worry, I'm secure enough to deal with the bullshit."
Gavin blinked, the drunken flush to his tan cheeks growing more pronounced. "I said something wrong, didn't I?"
Gavin's light eyes were glazed. His black hair stuck up at odd angles. It was obvious even the hardy Irish blood that ran in Gavin Connolly's veins couldn't hold up to the binge he'd been on for the past eight hours.
"Don't worry about it." Brad took another sip of his beer, feeling like he needed it. "You're drunk. I get it."
"But I don't wanna piss you off. I care about ya. You're like a--" Gavin paused, turning to look blankly at the television as if searching for the right word. "Well, you're not really a buddy. I mean, you are a buddy, but you're more than a buddy to me. Much more. I don't care if the boys at the station make fun of me. I'm glad we're roommates."
"Wow." Brad widened his eyes at that disaster of an explanation. "You're a really bad drunk."
"I don't drink that much." Gavin took another swig of his beer and then mumbled against the rim, "Damn kid, why'd he have to pull a gun? So fucking stupid."
"You didn't kill him." Brad sighed, knowing Gavin had a very good reason for the uncharacteristic pity party. "He'll be all right."
"Luck." Gavin snorted. "It's a fucking miracle that bullet missed his heart."
"Maybe we oughta go back to talking about how awesome you are for having a gay roommate," Brad offered with a wince.
"Do you know how much bureaucratic bullshit I've gone through in the past three days? All 'cause that damn kid pulled a gun. My name's all over the news."
"You're a hero, man. Who knows what that asshole would've done if you hadn't taken him down."
"That's just it." Gavin turned back to Brad, a look of misery shining in his light eyes. "I don't feel like a hero. I feel like a guy who shot a nineteen-year-old kid for making a bad decision."
Forgetting about the distance he usually forced between them, Brad got up and kicked aside some of the beer bottles to sit next to Gavin on the floor. He wasn't really sure why he did it. Maybe it was Gavin looking more like a kicked puppy than the cool, easygoing roommate he'd gotten used to over the past several months.
"You're a good cop," Brad said softly, leaning back against the couch. "And more importantly, you're a good guy. It was a justified shooting. The shoot team's gonna clear you to go back to work in a few more days. Everything will be fine. I promise."
"Thanks." Gavin gave him a dazzling smile, as if forgetting his bout of melancholy. "You're a real buddy. The best one I got. Talking you into renting me this room was the best thing I ever did. And you thought it wouldn't work out."
Brad remembered with stunning clarity the reason why he kept his distance from Gavin. He was too fucking handsome. The contrast between his black hair and light eyes was startling. His face was both beautiful and masculine with his hard jaw and full lips. And his body... Jesus. Brad turned back to the television, the chant of it'd be a mistake echoing in his mind.
Brad's taste in men was dangerous. He was naturally drawn to broad shoulders, powerful muscles, rock-solid abs--the harder and more masculine the better. He didn't have a problem with softer gay men. Pretty bottoms with floppy hair and slim bodies were fine. He just didn't want to fuck them.
It was highly inconvenient that Brad's line of work left him drowning in testosterone. If it wasn't the other firefighters and paramedics he worked with, it was cops like Gavin. But Brad was thirty-eight; he had learned to separate his private and professional lives. The straight ones he kept his distance from, the gay ones--well, he could tell Gavin a few things about some of those guys he worked with. They were probably the same assholes laughing at him for having a gay roommate. Closeted gay men were the worst.
"I'm not really secure in my sexuality," Gavin whispered over the hum of the television. "That was bullshit."
Brad looked toward the ceiling, praying for patience. The only thing worse than a closeted gay man was one who had his head so far up his ass he didn't realize he had the inclination.
Gavin, for example.
Straight cops didn't beg and plead to rent a room from a gay firefighter unless they were looking for something. Not to mention Gavin was drop-dead gorgeous. He could get any woman he wanted, but the asshole didn't date.
If Brad were younger and dumber, he would have rejoiced in helping Gavin solve his dating problems, but Brad wasn't young and dumb. He was middle-aged and cynical. He didn't need beautiful and buff Gavin with his pretty eyes and strong jaw. He wanted the hell out of him, so much so he hadn't gotten laid in months because he'd rather play domestic with the most clueless cop in Tampa Bay, but he didn't need him.
"Time to go to bed." Brad reached over to pull the beer out of Gavin's hand. "You've officially had one too many. I'm ending this pity party."
"Do you think I'm handsome?" Gavin asked, eyes wide and glazed with liquid courage.
"I think you're unavailable," Brad said evenly instead of voice his thoughts out loud. "Trust me, Gavin, you want to go to bed now."
"I don't see you looking at me," Gavin mumbled rather than take Brad's advice. He appeared genuinely disappointed with the lack of attention. "Maybe only women think I'm hot."
Brad rolled his eyes at Gavin's vanity that was oddly charming. Arrogant but unassuming--not many could make that work.
"It's not only women," Brad found himself admitting. "You're hot; anyone would think so."
"Would you think so?"
Brad took a long drink of the beer he'd stolen from Gavin and resumed his staring contest with the television. His cock flared to life, demanding he answer in the affirmative. His mind reminded him of the disaster it would create in the morning when the booze wore off. He was a little too old to do awkward to that extreme.
He made the mistake of looking at Gavin when he heard the pleading desperation. Gavin's eyes swirled with haunted uncertainty, as if Brad could somehow solve his life problems. That was a very dangerous look. It made Gavin seem younger than thirty-four, more innocent, and wholly tempting in a way that sucker punched Brad with yearning. He swallowed hard past the rush of desire.
"Yeah," he whispered, knowing it was a mistake even as he said it. "I think you're handsome. Happy?"
He closed his eyes and prayed for strength when his defenses were at an all-time low. He was so focused on finding an inner source of defense, Brad ended up blindsided when a hard male body suddenly pressed against him. A rough hand ran over his jaw. Warm breath brushed against his lips.
Holy shit! Gavin was kissing him. The logical thing to do was push the drunken fool away, but Brad wasn't feeling logical. There was a crackle between them. The electric current of attraction was so overwhelming, Brad knew Gavin wasn't the only one in denial. He had wanted this man for a long time now, and no amount of past baggage was going to let Brad deny it when Gavin was making himself this available.
He kissed him back. The excitement was palatable, reminding him of stolen, forbidden kisses between football players behind the bleachers. They were both frantic, needing to touch and feel everything at once. It was wild. It was sloppy. It felt unbelievably right when he knew it shouldn't.
Gavin had him feeling seventeen again.
Brad seized the moment like a drowning man. He tangled his fingers in Gavin's dark hair, wanting him closer. When Gavin straddled Brad's hips, settling on his lap like he belonged there, Brad thought it was a minor miracle he didn't come in his jeans.
He gripped Gavin's tight ass, moaning against his lips when he felt hard muscle through faded jeans. He arched his hips up, making his lap more user-friendly as Gavin rutted against him. Gavin's tongue thrust into his mouth to the intoxicating rhythm Gavin used to dry fuck Brad and the raw desperation that was addicting.
It wasn't until the need for air busted through the haze that Brad broke the kiss. He tossed his head back against the couch while Gavin moved over him with an uncontrolled need, as if so starved for sexual attention he couldn't even be bothered to remove clothes before searching for release. Brad's body actually vibrated with how badly he wanted this, and he tightened his hand in Gavin's hair, needing the lifeline.
"Get off on me," he growled, more a demand than a request. "Fuck my lap until you come."
"Yeah?" Gavin panted against the curve of his neck. He nipped lightly, his breath warm and soothing before his tongue laved over the wound. "Christ, I need this. I've had a bad week."
"I know, baby." Brad cupped his ass tighter, helping the grind. "You need it, take it."
Gavin rode him with intent. His kisses were bruising, wild, and wholly male in a way Brad loved. He gave as good as he got. Brad slipped his hand past the gap in Gavin's jeans, working beneath cotton underwear to grip the smooth skin of his ass. He wanted to feel his hole, to finger it and really get him off, but Brad knew he was dealing with his deeply in denial roommate. With every raspy breath, a part of him was waiting for Gavin to freeze in his arms and realize he was dry humping a man.
Gavin gasped as if catching Brad's thoughts, the frustration heavy in his voice as he begged. "Please."
Fuck it. Brad released Gavin's ass, then sucked on two fingers, doing it slowly, being deliberate and seductive. Gavin eyed Brad's mouth as his light eyes became glazed with longing. His breathing fell shallow like that of a starved animal while he watched Brad prepare his fingers to fuck his ass.
Brad released his fingers with a pop and demanded, "Take your dick out. I wanna see it."
Gavin leaned back against Brad's thighs. His hands shook as he worked on unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans. He pulled down white cotton briefs, letting his cock fall hard and heavy into his hand.
God, it was a nice cock--long, thick, and cut--with the head flaring red when Gavin fisted it. Brad sucked on his fingers once more. He entertained the idea of shoving Gavin off him and swallowing that cock, taking it deep and sloppy in a way he was certain a woman never could. If Gavin wanted to play gay man, Brad might as well give him the five-star tour.
Gavin shuddered while Brad had a moment with his fingers. "Please," he repeated, his desperation obvious. "You're teasing."
The harsh need was palpable with every raspy breath Gavin took.
Brad reached around Gavin to grab the back of his shirt and tug it up. With Gavin's help they got his shirt off, giving Brad a view of hard muscles before Gavin fell over him and buried his face in the curve of Brad's neck.
"Give it to me, baby." Brad fisted Gavin's hair once more. If he wanted it, he was going to have to work for it. "Show me what you want."
Gavin shuddered so violently from Brad's harsh demand, he was worried he accidently forced him over the edge. But then Gavin was shifting, his thighs sliding against the tile, pushing his bare cock tighter against Brad's stomach.
With Gavin practically vibrating in his arms, Brad slid his hand beneath the gap in his jeans, finding his hole with spit-slicked fingers. He circled it a few times, enjoying the way Gavin shifted impatiently, trying to impale himself on Brad's fingers.
"Shhh," he said, still getting acquainted with Gavin's ass. "Put your hands on my shoulders. We're going slow."
"Shit." Gavin's grip on Brad's shoulders was tight and bruising as he moved back against Brad's fingers once more. "Don't go slow. I want it hard. Fast. Cruel. Make me stop thinking."
Brad let those words burn through him as his hold tightened in Gavin's hair. He jerked his head back to watch Gavin's face as he gave him what he wanted. He thrust into his ass hard and mean. When Gavin gasped from the invasion, Brad curved his fingers up and rubbed against his prostate before he had time to adjust.
"Fuck!" Gavin's eyes flew open, stunned pleasure flashing electric blue.
Brad's grip on Gavin's hair was unforgiving as he kept his head back, forcing him to put the deviant indulgence on display. With only spit for lube, the rub of his fingers in Gavin's hot, incredibly tight ass was rough and gritty in a way that hit every kink button Brad had. He was in very real danger of coming in his jeans, but he didn't give a fuck, because Gavin looked amazing thrusting back against his hand, furiously searching for relief.
Brad enjoyed the show, knowing it was going to be material for a thousand jerk-off sessions. Sexy and wanton, Gavin was still grinding against Brad's jean-covered cock, desperate to come while Brad fingered his ass. He went back and forth between rubbing his prostate and stretching Gavin's hole, assuming he liked the burn. He obviously did, because he released Brad's shoulders to fist his cock.
"Oh no." Brad narrowed his eyes as he stopped the torment of Gavin's ass. "You want it from a man? You're gonna get it the way I like it. Let go of your dick or go find yourself a girlfriend."
Gavin shuddered and placed both hands back on Brad's shoulders without argument. It was obvious he liked being told what to do.
Brad's cock jerked inside his jeans, but he liked the bite of pain. It helped him keep control when everything in him wanted to bend Gavin over this couch and fuck him with something crueler than his fingers.
"Good boy." Brad rewarded his obedience with another nudge against his prostate.
Gavin jerked in his arms, crying out from the shock of pleasure.
"Christ, Brad, please." Gavin's entire body was shaking with the strain for climax. He tried to move back against Brad's hand, but Brad had him nestled tightly in his lap, taking his control. With Gavin's head wrenched back, the pleasure and need etched itself over his handsome features as he pleaded, "Fuck me. I want you to fuck me."
"I don't think so," Brad said, stretching him even as he denied both of them, because he wasn't going to fuck a man in denial when he was drunk. At least the rejection gave him a power buzz. "I will, however, enjoy watching you get off on my fingers. I'm gonna watch you as you come, Gav, and you're gonna enjoy letting me."
The defeat in Gavin was profound and fucking sexy as hell. Brad saw stars from the lust rush when Gavin became languid over him. Only taking what he was given, the tension was replaced with something much more erotic--total submission as he surrendered himself to Brad and the pleasure he was giving him.
More turned on than he'd been in his entire life, Brad finger fucked his ass with enthusiasm. He was eager to see Gavin come apart in his arms, and he wasn't disappointed as the powerful cop quickly ended up panting and frantic for a release from the onslaught. His breathing grew more and more ragged as he got closer to completion. No longer fighting for it now that he'd given Brad control, Gavin jerked with the stroke that pushed him over the edge. His body curved into the wrench on his hair and the grasp on his ass. His cry of pleasure was savage and unrestrained.
Brad clenched his teeth and fought against closing his eyes at the feeling of Gavin's ass clenching around his fingers. He watched Gavin's face instead, the sheer decadence of tasting the forbidden mapping its way over his beautiful features. He was completely enthralled by the image, and it left more than his cock aching. His chest swelled with an emotion he hadn't felt in a very long time as he admired the physical evidence of pleasure he was able to give Gavin.
Jesus, he could fall in love with this asshole.