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Down Home Ever Lovin' Mule Blues [MultiFormat]
eBook by Jacquie Rogers
eBook Category: Romance/Fantasy PRN Staff Top Pick, The Romance Studio (TRS) Sweetheart of the Week, Night Owl Romance Reviewer Top Pick
eBook Description: It Happened in the Idaho Desert The rodeo clown: Brody wants the thrill of bullfighting and the wind at his feet. The actuary: Rita doesn't want anything to do with a busted up cowboy--and odds are, Brody will be. The mule: Socrates understands humans. And love, even if humans don't. Can Socrates lead Brody to Rita's heart? Will Rita let herself take the biggest risk of all?
eBook Publisher: Highland Press/Westernn, Published: 2008, 2008
Fictionwise Release Date: June 2009
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"I enjoyed the way Socrates narrates Down Home Ever Lovin' Mule Blues. Socrates lends great humor to the tale. The dialogue and antics are fantastic. I love the sparkling characters and the chemistry they emit to each other. Jacquie Rogers takes Socrates and Guinevere, the skunk, along with some other frisky animals, and sets in motion one awesome read. The games alone are interesting and entertaining. With some laugh out loud antics, the secondary characters put an extra spin on the story, making the couple really shine in this extraordinary tale with splendid characterizations allowing this reader to feel great inside."--Cherokee, CoffeeTime Romance
"Needless to say, this is a fabulous roll on the floor while laughing out loud story. I am so thrilled to discover this book, and the author who wrote it. I adore romantic comedy. Rarely do I locate a story with as much humor, joy, and downright lust spread so thickly on the pages that I am surprised that I could turn the pages. Down Home Ever Lovin' Mule Blues is a treasure not to be missed. Thank you, Ms. Rogers, for all of the laughter, and joy that you bring to the reader of your fabulous book. Major Kudos to you!"--Suziq2, SingleTitles.com "With fascinating characters, a fun romance, and a matchmaking mule named Socrates, Down Home Ever Lovin' Mule Blues is an entertaining story."--Lilac, Long and Short Reviews "Without a doubt, I fell in love with this storyline from the very beginning. I absolutely loved how Ms. Rogers created a comical story and did a superb job of holding the reader s attention right to the very end. I loved the characters she created and couldn t help falling in love with Brody myself. The author had me laughing so hard throughout the story that my sides were hurting from all the antics Socrates and his friends were constantly up to. I honestly didn t want the story to end... I will recommend this story not only to my fellow animal loving friends, but also to anyone that would love to read a lighthearted love story that will entertain you for a few hours. This is definitely a keeper in my library and I look forward to reading many more stories from this talented author in the months to come. You ve done a fantastic job, Ms. Rogers."--Diana, Night Owl Romances "A light-hearted and hilarious romp into a world of rodeo clowns, family values, and romance, this story kept my attention glued tighter than a cowboy to the back of a crippled bucking bronco. Whether you enjoy fast romances with big business or the slower pace of a laid back western, this tale is for you. The menagerie kept me chuckling with delight throughout the entire story. Socrates is the main one in the animal spotlight, but the skunk just cannot help but outshine the mule often and the dog is a delight to behold. All-in-all, a perfect book to cuddle up with during the colder months of the year. Excellent!"--Detra Fitch, Huntress Reviews "Jacquie Rogers, author of Faery Special Romances has really outdone herself with Down Home Ever Lovin' Mule Blues. I could not help laughing at Socrates' plans and antics, I was love struck by the way her characters truly wanted each other ... It was so touching, heartwarming, and very well written that I could not put it down. . . Jacquie Rogers has a way of writing fantasy romances that puts the city girl with the cowboy in a most spectacular way with this novel."--Crystal, Book Reviews by Crystal "If you're an animal lover you'll definitely fall in love with this one, if not, let's say you will be after giving this book a try...Jacquie delivers laughs and some happy tears through adventure, one you'd definitely want to read over and over again...You will definitely want to hold this book close to your heart; Miss Jacquie sure knows how to bring a story to life, especially through unimaginable humor."--Mark, Book Cove Reviews "Jacquie Rogers gives us an excellent romance guided by Socrates' comments, plans, and ingenuity. Living up to his name he uses his wit and wisdom to get around all the road blocks his two humans seem to put between them. He's an escape artist who can get out of any trailer, barn or shed he's put in. These animals are the stars of the book. Any of us who've ever had four legged friends of our own can easily relate and marvel at the lengths they will go to in order to get Rita and Brody together. . . The author does a great job with the human characters too. . . This is a well told story that will keep you interested and smiling throughout."--Dee Dailey, The Romance Studio "Down Home Ever Lovin' Mule Blues is a highly entertaining read ... well written and thoroughly enjoyable."--SkyWalker, GhostWriter Reviews "The author's talent shines, giving a fast-paced, humorous tale that marks her as an author on the rise. It's sexy, sharp, witty and just plain fun!"--Deborah MacGillivray, Paranormal Romance Reviews
Grasmere, Idaho
Humans are so stubborn.
But never let it be said that we mules don't take care of our humans. Mine is Brody Alexander. I'm Socrates, master of cogitation and entertainer of both large and small children.
Infinite patience is required to endure Brody's abstinence. Granted, we john mules do have it easier than men. We don't have this hormone thing going on so we don't spend our lives trying to make little mules.
That gives us lots more time to cogitate. And believe me, I can think of a few more species who could do with a little thoughtful uncommon sense.
Human males, for instance. Why, they seem to spend every waking hour thinking about sex, getting sex, or being disappointed by not having sex.
That's how I see it. Except I left one thing out--human males need more than sex. They need love. My human could use a little loving these days. Why, he's been moping around worse than a porcupine on a bad hair day.
That's where the cogitating comes in. If testosterone hadn't clouded Brody's thinking, he'd already know what he needs. Funny thing, those hormones.
The way I see it, my job is to help his brain listen to his other parts--especially his heart. And I have the answer. Yes, sir, I do. I just saw a pretty little filly drive down the road, the very same one who mooned over Brody ten years ago.
It's time for action.
* * * *
Brody Alexander stomped into the house and threw his battered Stetson on the table. "Luke, have you seen that dang mule? He's let himself out of the barn again."
Luke smashed his cigarette in the ashtray. "Nope, but I s'pose he'll show up once he gets a little hungry. Or cold. Old Socrates don't like the cold." Luke slurped his coffee and let out a satisfied sigh. "There's scrambled eggs on the stove."
The phone rang. He nodded toward it. "That might be him now."
"Don't be a smart ass." Brody yanked the handset off the cradle. "Hello."
"Howdy. Your mule's in our pantry eating apples." He recognized the partly annoyed, partly amused voice of Judy Markum, the middle-aged widow from up the road.
"Uh, sorry, ma'am. I'll be right over."
Luke chuckled. "It was him, wasn't it?"
"Smart ass." Grabbing his hat, Brody made for the pickup and hitched up the trailer--the splint on his left arm not making the task any easier, or his humor any better. Sometimes he'd like to kick that dang mule into next Sunday.
Perseus, his Australian Shepherd, hopped into the pickup before Brody had the door halfway open. The old '62 Chevy was already warmed up from hauling feed to the cattle. The heater worked even if the rest of the pickup decided not to--a blessing in the crisp autumn Owyhee mornings. He took off for the Markum place.
Five minutes of bumpy dirt road later, he pulled in front of Judy's white stucco house with yellow trim. Snapdragons and petunias grew along the perimeter of the house, and the tinkle of the wind chimes seemed to smile on visitors.
She stood in the front doorway propped on her crutches, waving him in. At least she had a smile on her weathered face. He got out of the pickup and tipped his hat at her.
"Good morning, Judy."
Her dog, Beauty, ran up and nuzzled his hand. He obliged her with a few quick scratches behind her ears. A late-model tan Volvo was parked beside the Markum barn. He smirked, knowing that no local would have an expensive, foreign car with no ground clearance. Socrates had picked a mighty poor time to work up a hunger for the neighbor's apples.
"Come on in, Brody." Judy seemed quite happy for a woman with a mule in her house.
He took off his hat and trudged in. "Evenin', ma'am. I'm sorry about Socrates. Where is he? I'll get him out of your hair."
"It's my apples I'm worried about, not my hair." She pointed to a curtained room off the kitchen. "He's in there. Probably the happiest miniature mule in the world right now."
Brody made for the pantry, ready to give that mule the what-for. But the obnoxious beast beat him to the punch, sauntering out with a Red Delicious in his mouth. Socrates dodged Brody's one-handed grab for the halter and trotted into the living room.
Brody gritted his teeth. Judy's guests would be in there, and here he had to chase a flea-bitten mule. Oh well, might as well act the clown. After all, he did it for a living.
"I do not want that animal on my new carpet!" Judy hobbled after him.
He held her back and called to the mule, "Socrates, get your tush out here." In two long strides, Brody managed to grab the mule's halter. "What in the Sam Hill do you think you're doing? Let's go home."
"Hello, cowboy." The feminine voice was sultry, and familiar.
Brody stopped cold, took a breath, and turned toward the voice.
There she sat on the couch, little Rita Markum, holding the apple Socrates had brought her. Only she wasn't little anymore. Not that she'd grown taller or gotten fat. Nope, she'd filled out into one helluva woman. He felt a certain amount of compassion for old Adam in the Garden of Eden. If Eve bore any resemblance to Rita, poor Adam never had a chance.
He couldn't help but notice the tasteful tan linen business suit she wore--and the smooth, shapely thigh exposed when she crossed her legs. Brody's mouth went dry. Whew, baby. Her hair was still blonde, although shorter, and her blue eyes even bluer. He hoped she still wanted him like she did that day of her high school graduation, because he sure wouldn't mind taking up where they left off.
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