
So God, He decides to give it His best shot, and He says, "Thou hast made mockery of My name for the last time!"
And Mr. Slatterman, he pretends he doesn't even notice that the craps table is missing and all the people have vanished, and he looks God full in the eye, and he says, "I didn't take your name in vain, especially if you're who I think you are, and besides, if you will just take the trouble to check the record you will find that my precise words were 'Baby needs a new pair of shoes!'"
And God glares at him, and says, very stentoriously, "How darest thou speak to Me in such a tone of voice!"
And Mr. Slatterman, whose eyes are all squinched up because of how bright the Almighty is, he comes right back bold as you please, and says, "Well, just you be careful about who you go around of accusing of things they didn't rightly do, and what's more, I don't think I believe in you."
"What you believe is of no import," said God, Who has a feeling that He is not getting His point across. "You have repeatedly broken My Sabbath and disobeyed My laws that I gave unto Moses. Thou are an abomination unto My sight!"
"Now just hold it right there!" snaps Mr. Slatterman. "Bartenders got a right to live too, you know, and if you weren't so all-fired anxious to make everyone suffer the tortures of the damned, or at least as close an approximation as the Internal Revenue Service can whip up on short notice, then maybe I wouldn't be so damned busy on your day off, and could even get in a little golf."