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Ridi Bobo [MultiFormat]
eBook by Robert Devereaux
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eBook Category: Dark Fantasy
eBook Description:  I Pagliacci meets Sam Spade in this wild mix of noir fiction and the colorful world of the big top. Fearing that his wife Kiki has allowed her bicycle honker to admit entry of some other clown's rubber chicken, Bobo seeks out a mopey, sad-eyed gumshoe to spy upon her and bring back photographic evidence. When he notes common markings on her paramour's face and those of JoJo and JuJu, their two young children, Bobo starts to deviate from a cuckolded clown's expected reactions. Will the poor fellow turn rogue? Or will he regain his composure and follow the well-worn path of mimed tears, a pistol with a BANG flag, and buffeting his wife about the head with an inflated pig's bladder? This tale beguiled its way into two "best of" horror anthologies after an initial appearance in Weird Tales.
eBook Publisher: Fictionwise.com, Published: Weird Tales, 1993
Fictionwise Release Date: May 2006
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Available eBook Formats [MultiFormat - What's this?]: Adobe Acrobat (PDF) [163 KB], eReader (PDB) [26 KB], Palm Doc (PDB) [13 KB], Rocket/REB1100 (RB) [12 KB], Microsoft Reader (LIT) [74 KB] - PocketPC 1.0+ Compatible, Franklin eBookMan (FUB) [85 KB], hiebook (KML) [83 KB], Sony Reader (LRF) [41 KB], iSilo (PDB) [10 KB], Mobipocket (PRC) [13 KB], Kindle Compatible (MOBI) [41 KB], OEBFF Format (IMP) [21 KB]
Words: 3678
Reading time: 10-14 min.
Microsoft Reader (LIT) Format: Printing DISABLED, Read-Aloud ENABLED
Adobe Acrobat (PDF) Format: Printing DISABLED, Read-Aloud DISABLED
All Other formats: Printing DISABLED, Read-aloud DISABLED
 
At first little things niggled at Bobo's mind: the forced quality of Kiki's mimed chuckle when he went into his daily pratfall getting out of bed; the great care she began to take painting in the teardrop below her left eye; the way she idly fingered a pink puffball halfway down her shiny green suit. Then more blatant signals: the creases in her crimson frown, a sign, he knew, of real discontent; the bored arcs her floppy shoes described when she walked the ruff-necked piglets; a wistful shake of the head when he brought out their favorite set of shiny steel rings and invited her, with the artful pleas of his expressive white gloves, to juggle with him.
But Bobo knew it was time to seek professional help when he whipped out his rubber chicken and held it aloft in a stranglehold--its eyes X'd shut in fake death, its pitiful head lolled against the back of his glove--and all Kiki could offer was a soundless yawn, a fatigued cock of her conical nightcap, and the curve of her back, one lazy hand waving bye-bye before collapsing languidly beside her head on the pillow. No honker would be brought forth that evening from her deep hip pocket, though he could discern its outline there beneath the cloth, a coy maddening shape that almost made him hop from toe to toe on his own. But he stopped himself, stared forlornly at the flaccid fowl in his hand, and shoved it back inside his trousers.
He went to check on the twins, their little gloved hands hugging the blankets to their chins, their perfect snowflake-white faces vacant with sleep. People said they looked more like Kiki than him, with their lime-green hair and the markings around their eyes. Beautiful boys, Jojo and Juju. He kissed their warm round red noses and softly closed the door.
In the morning, Bobo, wearing a tangerine apron over his bright blue suit, watched Kiki drive off in their new rattletrap Weezo, thick puffs of exhaust exploding out its tailpipe. Back in the kitchen, he reached for the Buy-Me Pages. Nervously rubbing his pate with his left palm, he slalomed his right index finger down the Snooper listings. Lots of flashy razz-ma-tazz ads, lots of zingers to catch a poor clown's attention. He needed simple. He needed quick. Ah! His finger thocked the entry short and solid as a raindrop on a roof; he noted the address and slammed the book shut.
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