"Jean-Luc ... there's something I've been wanting to tell you."
Picard put down the book of Shakespeare sonnets he'd been skimming and leaned back in his chair, eyebrow raised in curiosity. Crusher stood in the doorway, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to the other and looking more apprehensive than at any time Picard could recall.
"Problem?" asked Picard. He gestured to the chair opposite the desk. "If there's anything I can do to help, you know I will."
"Thank you, Jean-Luc. It's good to know that, in times of stress, there are friends I can count on." Crusher crossed quickly and sat down, ramrod straight ... but, a moment later, was up and pacing. Picard sat patiently, not rushing his longtime friend and associate. Then Crusher stopped, faced Picard, and said, "A woman is coming aboard the Enterprise whose presence is going to make me extremely uncomfortable."
"Former lover?" asked Picard.
"Ohhh yes," said Crusher. "Yes, she certainly was that. And I hate to say it, but even now when I think about her, she makes me ... "
Picard waited, but then prompted, "Nostalgic?"
"Itchy, actually," Crusher said sheepishly. "Silly, isn't it? After all this time?"
"So who is it?" asked Picard. "Natalie?"
"No, not Natalie."
"Amanda, then. Or Lucy perhaps? Don't tell me it's Lucy; she came after me, you know, after you two broke it off. The woman was ... determined, shall we say."
"Actually, 'legendary' is probably the more accurate term," said Crusher.
" 'Legendary' is not too bad a term to ascribe to yourself, actually," Picard said, smiling. "You've had a formidable number of amorous encounters in the years since you broke up with ... "
Then he understood, for Picard didn't even have to say the name. The merest oblique reference was enough to take Crusher's face and taint it with a layer of pain.
"Beverly," said Picard.
Crusher nodded.
Picard considered his next words carefully ... not that he was one to toss off utterances rashly under any circumstance. One did not, after all, become the first officer on the Fleet's flagship without making a habit of proceeding with caution. Rather than addressing the obvious emotional pitfalls immediately, he opted to approach the matter slowly. He asked what was, really, the least important question he could come up with. "When did this happen?" he asked.
"The assignment came in late last night. I've been spending much of the night stewing over it. I'm going to be a delight on the bridge this morning, I can promise you that."
Picard smiled sympathetically. "I have every confidence in you, Captain."
Crusher laughed softly. "I wish I did. You're not to quote me on that, of course. If anyone ever asks you, I am the apostle of aplomb."
"Those very words have been used to describe you on any number of occasions."
Picard felt a measure of relief. At least Crusher seemed to be regarding the situation with a degree of gallows humor ... which was preferable, certainly, to deep depression. Now, though, was the time to move forward. To explore just how in the hell this situation had come about. "What position will Beverly ... is it still 'Crusher' ... ?"
The captain shook his head. "No. She went back to 'Howard' after we split up."
"All right. What position will Dr. Howard be assuming on our fair vessel?"
Crusher smiled thinly. "CMO, of course. Nothing but the best for my ex."
Picard was not successful in dissembling his lack of enthusiasm for that piece of news. "Jack ... I don't know if that's such a good idea. The chief medical officer and a starship captain ... they have a special relationship on a vessel. They have to work smoothly together. They have to be a team. When you and Beverly split, it was not on the happiest of terms.... "
"You're telling me?" Jack Crusher tried not to laugh. "I was there, Jean-Luc, remember?"
"We were both there, Jack."
"I know, I know." Crusher endeavored to sit, but the closest he came was leaning on the back of the chair.
"Does Beverly know you're in command of the Enterprise?" asked Picard. "We're newly commissioned, after all. Only been in space a few weeks. It's possible ... "
"No, it's not possible," said Crusher, shaking his head. "You don't seriously believe that Beverly would take an assignment without knowing who her CO is going to be, do you?"
"Not the Beverly I remember, no," admitted Picard. "But why would she accept the assignment, then, knowing that you're here?"
"Are you kidding?" said Crusher. His face was round, the additional years having added a few pounds to his previously square-jawed face. His once-thick brown hair was seriously thinning on top and graying at the sides, a condition that elicited absolutely no sympathy from Picard. "This is the Enterprise ... the prestige and the history that's attached to that name ... what reasonable officer could pass that up?"
"I certainly could not have," agreed Picard. And then he added a bit ruefully, "Not that I had many options ... "
Crusher sucked in air between his teeth, a long-standing habit when confronted with unpleasant truths. "Do we really want to go down that road again, Number One?"
"No, of course not," said Picard. "We were speaking of your problems, not mine." He tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, and was only partly successful. Mentally he chided himself. With all the practice he'd had at trying to control his frustration over his career track, one would think that he'd be more accomplished at bottling his feelings by now.
If Crusher picked up on Picard's tone of voice, he did not let on. "My problems, Jean-Luc, are your problems," said Crusher. "I'm a big believer in the pass-along theory of aggravation." He let that sink in, and then continued, "Now, as we've already made painfully clear, Beverly would have to be crazy to turn down the position of chief medical officer on the Enterprise. My loving ex-wife may be many things, but crazy she most definitely is not. Another thing that she is 'not' is afraid of confrontations. And if the only impediment to her taking a position is that it might bring her friction from her superior officer, then I assure you, Picard, that's no impediment at all."
"She's not on the ship yet, however," Picard pointed out after a moment.
"You're right, Jean-Luc," said Crusher in wonderment, as if the thought had not occurred to him. He leaned forward and whispered conspiratorially, "We'll tell the whole crew to hide. When she comes aboard, she'll find no one here, and then maybe she'll leave."
Crusher maintained such a deadpan expression as he spoke that it was all Picard could do not to laugh. "You know what I mean."
"Yes, I know precisely what you mean," said Crusher. "You mean that, as captain of the Enterprise, I could block her appointment to this vessel. Raise a fuss, and there's no way that Starfleet will ram her down my throat."
"Correct."
"Yeah, well, there's two problems with that. First, I don't want to be that petty. And second, the simple fact is that Beverly Howard is the best person for the job. Period. Her record is outstanding and unblemished. This ship, this crew, deserves the best, and I'll be damned if I let my personal history stand in the way of this crew's best interests."
"That's very noble of you, Captain."
"Like hell. I just don't want to put myself in the position of taking on a CMO who's not the best. Because the very first time a crewman dies, I'll start second-guessing myself that maybe Beverly could have made a difference. Wouldn't matter if God himself came down, looked at the dying crewman, and said, 'Sorry ... nothing I can do to help, I'm afraid.' I'd still be thinking, 'Damn ... should have had Beverly aboard.' "
"That's quite a lot of expectations to put on the woman's shoulders."
"She has broad enough shoulders. She can handle it."
"Yes, but can you?"
"Guess I'll have to."
Crusher rose from the chair and started for the door, when Picard said, "If I might make an offer, Captain ... ?"
He turned. "Yes?"
"I would be perfectly happy to ... run interference, for lack of a better way to put it. I'll handle most of the interfacing between commander and medical."
"Are you implying that I can't handle her, Picard?"
"Not at all. I am saying, however, that no captain can handle everything. And if you should choose to delegate this responsibility to me, I would be more than happy to assume it." When Crusher did not reply immediately, Picard noted, "Might I point out, Captain, that you were considerate enough to honor my request that I not deal directly with the children aboard the ship. I made my concerns plain to you. You said you understood, and were perfectly comfortable with assuming that responsibility yourself. I see this as simply returning the favor."
Crusher nodded slowly. "I suppose you've got a valid enough point there. All right, Number One. I don't want to be perceived as hiding in my ready room, of course. If our soon-to-be chief medical officer wishes to meet with me at any time, she is of course welcome to do so. You are not to interfere in that regard. But for simple day-to-day interaction" -- he gestured expansively -- "she's all yours."
"Whatever you say, sir."
Crusher gave it a moment's more thought and then said, "You know ... actually, we're not completely even. After all, there's a bunch of kids. There's only one Beverly Howard."
"Quite true," agreed Picard readily. "There's only one Beverly."
Copyright © 1994 by Paramount Pictures
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Captain Jean-Luc Picard has never faced an opponent more powerful than Q, a being from another continuum that Picard encountered on his very first mission as Captain of the Starship Enterprise. Q has returned again and again to harass Picard and his crew. Sometimes dangerous, sometimes merely obnoxious, Q has been seemingly all-powerful.
