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eBook Category: Dark Fantasy
eBook Description: Sally judged men by their teeth. Missing teeth were suspicious. Discolored ones were the sign of a coward or cheapskate. She wasn't sure what to make of blue teeth ... but they knew what to make of her.

eBook Publisher: Fictionwise.com, Published: Dark Regions, 2001
Fictionwise Release Date: November 2002

26 Reader Ratings: Great Good OK Poor

Available eBook Formats [MultiFormat - What's this?]: Adobe Acrobat (PDF) [35 KB], eReader (PDB) [18 KB], Palm Doc (PDB) [4 KB], Rocket/REB1100 (RB) [5 KB], Microsoft Reader (LIT) [58 KB] - PocketPC 1.0+ Compatible, Franklin eBookMan (FUB) [74 KB], hiebook (KML) [42 KB], Sony Reader (LRF) [31 KB], iSilo (PDB) [4 KB], Mobipocket (PRC) [5 KB], Kindle Compatible (MOBI) [32 KB], OEBFF Format (IMP) [10 KB]
Words: 1324
Reading time: 3-5 min.
Microsoft Reader (LIT) Format: Printing DISABLED, Read-Aloud ENABLED
Adobe Acrobat (PDF) Format:  Printing DISABLED, Read-Aloud DISABLED
All Other formats: Printing DISABLED, Read-aloud DISABLED

"After a final heartbreak, Sally has sworn off men. But one night at a club she meets a man with perfect, blue teeth. He's a nice enough sort of guy, and he further piques her interest by claiming that his teeth have magic powers. Sure enough, they do. As any reader of fairy tales knows, however, not all magic is benign. Simon and Boston quick-sketch an amusing little jape."--Jeff Verona, Tangent Online (Learn more about Tangent Online, the Internet's leading SF&F short fiction review website)

Sometimes we girls used to get together after work. We liked this one club, Maxie's, down on 45th and Main. I swear, I was never looking to get picked up or anything like that. Not me. After Del ran off with that bitch from merchandising, I swore off taking men seriously.

So one night we were sitting there at the bar drinking Margaritas. The thing about Maxie's is that they have a live band on Tuesdays, for dancing, and this was a Tuesday. I was really getting into the music, tapping my toes on the stool and wiggling in the seat. Definitely feeling all right and looking it too. So when this guy comes over, I'm not surprised. I mean, I may not be Madonna, but I know how to flaunt my assets.

Didn't notice anything special about the guy at first. Sure wasn't any kind of a hunk, not in your dreams. But then he smiled and that smile of his really got to me. Perfect teeth, just the right size. You know what they say about a man's teeth? Doesn't matter how smooth a talker he is, no way he can hide those choppers. Teeth tell a story, doesn't matter what kind of line the guy is feeding you. Discolored ones are bad, or maybe just sad. Usually means he's too poor or cowardly to get them pulled and fitted for dentures. Missing ones are suspicious. If his breath stinks, forget it, you're wasting your time.

So anyway, it wasn't just that part about them being perfect, clean, and all that. See, this guy's teeth were blue! Not turquoise or royal blue or blue like the sky. No, more like a real and for sure blue. Like the word "blue" itself.

Sure, we're used to seeing body paint and tattoos, hair dyed all colors of the rainbow and then some. But teeth? No way.

"Hey there, gorgeous," he says to me.