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eBook Category: Erotica/Romance
eBook Description: The night before Noah Hill left his hometown of Mountain View, he had a drunken sexual tryst with his best friend, Lucas Wesson. Deeply in the closet, Noah is horrified at his behavior, and terrified of what Lucas would think of him. He left the next morning without saying goodbye, and effectively cut off all ties. He returns five years later to help his father, and runs into his old best friend almost as soon as he reaches town. And nothing has changed. He still loves Lucas, and he still can't stand to meet the other man's eyes. Lucas has been through a lot in the past five years without his best friend's support. A marriage. A divorce. A child. Running his own business. He also remembers his one night with Noah with perfect clarity. For five years, he only wanted Noah to come home. But now that Noah is back, things have changed too much to ever be the same between them... Genres: Gay / Contemporary [This title is part of the You Make Me Live AmberPax Collection.]

eBook Publisher: Amber Quill Press, Published: 2007
Fictionwise Release Date: April 2008

43 Reader Ratings: Great Good OK Poor

Available eBook Formats [MultiFormat - What's this?]: Adobe Acrobat (PDF) [442 KB], eReader (PDB) [129 KB], Palm Doc (PDB) [110 KB], Rocket/REB1100 (RB) [100 KB], Microsoft Reader (LIT) [128 KB] - PocketPC 1.0+ Compatible, Franklin eBookMan (FUB) [158 KB], hiebook (KML) [287 KB], Sony Reader (LRF) [168 KB], iSilo (PDB) [90 KB], Mobipocket (PRC) [116 KB], Kindle Compatible (MOBI) [155 KB], OEBFF Format (IMP) [157 KB]
Words: 34960
Reading time: 99-139 min.
Microsoft Reader (LIT) Format: Printing DISABLED, Read-Aloud ENABLED
Adobe Acrobat (PDF) Format:  Printing DISABLED, Read-Aloud ENABLED
All Other formats: Printing DISABLED, Read-aloud DISABLED

"5 HEARTS! ... Pepper Espinoza has written a spicy tale of two friends fighting for the love they could share. I found Noah...such a likeable character. His answer to hard problems seemed to be run, but thankfully by the end he figured out running was not always the answer. Lucas was definitely the strong one. I loved this character for being so well written and real. I believe, however, that Lily made this story with her sweet innocence and acceptance. I would highly recommend this one. It has it all, love, steamy sex between two equally steamy men and the sweetest child."--Sandra, The Romance Studio

"4.5 BLUE RIBBONS!...captures all the confusion, hope and fear that go along with falling in love with your best friend. In this case, it's a little more complicated since neither man is openly gay and Noah has been living with his guilt and fear since he moved away. As if the friction taking place between Noah and Lucas isn't enough to tantalize readers, Lucas's daughter, Lily, will steal your heart with her innocence and easy acceptance--something that Noah doesn't get from his father...If you enjoy gay romance stories then be sure to check out ... MY ONLY HOME."--Chrissy Dionne

Noah opened his eyes and growled with frustration. What had happened? What had Lucas said? Had they kissed again? Had they done more? Did Luke push him away? How did he get that home that night?

Everything from the kiss to when he woke up the next morning wasn't just a blur, it was gone. Anything could have happened in those hours. And he had no clues when he woke up. No note from Luke, no signs on his body that anything more happened, no residual feelings--nothing except a hangover and a flush of embarrassment. Did it matter if anything happened after the kiss? Wasn't the kiss bad enough?

The kiss had been bad enough to make him run away and never look back. Ultimately, it didn't matter how Luke had reacted. Noah was leaving and Luke was in love with Lilah, and that's all that really matter. It occurred to him once or twice that it would be as easy as picking up the phone to find out what had occurred, to find out what, exactly, he was hiding from.

But the only thing easier than picking up the phone was not picking up the phone. The only thing easier than facing his feelings was pretending that he didn't have any feelings at all. The only thing easier than keeping up his closest friendship was letting it slip away, a casualty to time, and distance, and avoidance. And shame.

Noah rubbed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to clear his head. It didn't seem like Lucas was holding a grudge against him. Noah took that as a good sign. He didn't know if his need to reconnect was just a selfish indulgence, but he did know that the only thing he regretted was the loss of their friendship.

Noah got back in his car, but he didn't start the engine. Instead, he dropped the chair back and watched the sky through the window, covering himself with his jacket to ward off the chill. It wasn't nearly as comfortable as a bed, but he didn't relish the thought of returning home. He was content to lay there, letting his mind drift from one subject to the next, from one memory to another.

Somehow, it always came back to Luke.